A note from Erin 11/25/25
Dear beautiful human,
I’m sending warm greetings. I’m grateful to reach out to you today. Warm welcome to our new subscribers, and warm greetings to those of you who’ve been here for a while. We’re so grateful to be connected.
Back in 2019, I heard from a colleague who lived with the Quechua-speaking people in Peru that in their language, the way they say “thank you” is “a little bird flies from my heart to yours.” I hope you might receive this missive like a little bird flying from my heart to yours. Hi over there!
A week or so ago, a dear friend came to visit. As we sat on the couches in our living room, talking about life, she said, “What I’d really like you two to teach about is how to have a good relationship.” We looked at each other and laughed. We’re lucky to have a really great relationship, and we’ve invested in that over many years. I said, “Everything we’d say about how to have a good relationship is embedded in Refugia,” our upcoming 13-month training.
It turns out that when you invest in growing your embodied presence, nurturing your courageous lovingkindness, deepening your listening skills (inner & outer), embodying soul manners, honoring grief as sacred ground, deepening connection with the web of life, the ancestors, and the future ones, and consciously bringing forth your gifts, your relationships will change in beautiful, life-giving ways. (Or alternately, they’ll fall away if they can’t accommodate that growth, and you’ll find new ones that will.)
In fact, we hear all the time how these embodied soul skills support people across many contexts: being a better therapist, a more connected parent, a freer creative artist, a more skillful teacher, a better friend or partner, a more attuned healer, a more courageous soul activist, a more grounded public speaker, a more capacious grief-tender.
This education is all about growing our adult presence and dedicating ourselves to being in service to life. (I don’t know about you, but when I look around, I see a world where authentically mature adults who are dedicated to serving life are sorely needed!) As the late, great Joanna Macy said, “The greatest gift we can give our world is our full presence, and our open hearts.” Refugia offers a robust learning context where we can very directly and potently actualize our capacities and hone our skills to embody this.
We are grateful to have many wonderful beings who have signed up to join us in each cohort. It’s on! We are currently accepting applications from anyone who wishes to join us in this enlivening learning. We will begin the journey in early February – right between the winter solstice and the spring equinox – an auspicious time of new beginnings. This week, I’m putting the finishing touches on a webpage for our Refugia Retreat, which will happen next July in Boulder, Utah, one of the most beautiful places on Earth! (This retreat will be opened first to our Refugia participants, and if it doesn’t fill, we’ll open it to our general mailing list.) We are so lit by the opportunity to share this learning with people who are called to step in and go deep. And we can’t wait to gather on those sacred lands in Southern Utah together in person! We haven’t done an in-person retreat since before the pandemic. Can you tell I’m excited?? Please read more and apply to join us if you like.
We have another upcoming offering I’d love to share with you.
On December 4th, we’re looking forward to gathering with our beloved friends, Alyona Kobevka & Alexandre Jodun, to host a Council for Grief Tenders. This is a live online gathering with four experienced grief ritual facilitators where you can ask questions, share struggles, relish the beauty in this work, connect with other grief tenders, and receive support and insights to deepen your skills at holding space for grief. Anyone who currently holds space for grief or aspires to in the future is welcome to attend. Feel free to register even if you can’t be there live, as recordings will be shared. You’re also welcome to submit questions that we can weave into the live event. We absolutely love the supportive vibe in the global community of grief tenders who have come together at each of these gatherings. There is no sense of competition, but rather a potent spirit of camaraderie and encouragement. Martín Prechtel says so accurately, “All war is unmetabolized grief.” We believe grief work benefits the world now and in the future. Please feel free to join us. This 2.5 hour gatherings is offered with sliding scale tuition.
By the way, have I mentioned how wonderful Alexandre & Alyona are? We are so grateful to have them coming to the US twice next year for Grief Rituals, and as guest teachers in Refugia as well. They are deeply mature, well-practiced, authentically devoted, brilliant human beings who are kindred souls deeply aligned with our shared values. I can’t recommend them highly enough. They do 1:1 work as well if you’re looking for that kind of support.
Friends, I hope you feel this little bird flying from my heart to yours. I hope you might be inspired to join us in one of these supportive gatherings. You can read more about them below. In the meantime, we are sending all our best wishes your way.
Let’s keep reaching toward each other and leaning toward love, no matter what. As Mary Oliver wrote about a teaching she received from some wise goldfinches, “It is a serious thing just to be alive on this fresh morning in this broken world.” Isn’t it? May we not miss the gift.
Thanks for being here. Thanks for being you in the world. Thanks for making the world a kinder place. Let’s keep taking exquisite care of each other and of all our siblings in this web of life.
From my heart,
Erin
p.s. I find myself clicking on many online lists of gift ideas. I decided to put together my own list of gift ideas – none of which I’ve seen on other lists. Find that below.
p.p.s. Last year, I wrote a piece on Thanksgiving that I’d like to share with you again. Click here to read “The Ripened Adults We Came Here To Become.” And for those of you who celebrate, I’m wishing you a Happy Thanksgiving.
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